Emotions: Bereavement

Today I heard news that a friend just lost their less than 2 week old baby... the news obviously came as a shock to me and I was speechless at first. Emotions are such a curious thing that lurk within you and make you feel and react instinctively without thought... when i first heard about it through a mutual friend, unbeleivably, i thought well maybe it was best that they lost their baby... what a horrible thought I know... for 2 reasons I thought this.. 1) The baby wasn't well, he had a heart condition and probably would not have the quality of life that he deserved...I dont know the details of his heart ondition but that was one thought and the other 2) the couple, the mother and father have been going through some trying times and as much as I know the father loves his son, I also know that for months the father wanted to end his relationship with the mother... and I think in some way he gave in because of their unborn child.... What a horrible thought but in my mind it was like an escape for this couple... to work on their relationship without the complications of a child... then i also realised that maybe this loss might bring them closer in their shared lost...but whatever the case maybe I do not wish that upon anyone and am truly sorry for their lost...

I went to the blog that I heard from our mutual friend that announced this tragedy... and as I read the blog... all those thoughts were completely erased from my mind... the cold thoughts of an outsider were completely erased and i started to tear and feel the full strength of emotions overwhelm me... my friend has just lost her baby... and I can't even begin to imagine the pain she and her boyfriend are going though... I love you Tati and Mark...and even though I'm not posting this on my 360 blog where you guys and all our friends would see it ...(I think its too painful and too insensitive to post these personal thoughts of mine there... I did post my condolescences on Tat's 360) my prayers and thoughts are with you and your beautiful son Tomas.